Proof That Purrs and Claws Will Get You Anywhere
This is the first installment in my rankings of adult entertainment, as suggested by Kyle. Since this blog deals with primarily the nuances of relationships, including sex, it is only fair that I exercise my First Amendment right and my ethical obligation to fair journalism to present you with periodic reviews of Internet erotica. Oh yes, it's the holiday season, the blog has been quiet lately, and I will stoop to such levels.First up, a personal favorite: Persian Kitty's Adult Links. Yes, it sounds a little fluffy, and the overall layout of it is just like a little Persian Kitty wearing a Burberry sweater and eating Fancy Feast out of a silver bowl...until the homepage fully loads, with no-holds-barred, blurred out streaming video shots of compromising positions. Wow. Makes me think of Lil' Jon wanting a lady in the street but a freak in the bed. Yaay-yehh.
Anyway, on with the evaluation:
Variety:
This has everything you could ever want, in my opinion. Pictures, streaming audio and video, live cams, chat, and most importantly (and I say this with sarcasm) sex/relationship advice and info. Now, if I were the site, I would link the advice page to a blank screen with flashing text that says, "Here's some advice: don't go to a porn site for relationship advice. Are you seriously that clueless?" Also, this site has a nice rare erotic stories link, which one of my exes (who shall remain nameless) was extraordinarily fond of reading in the middle of the day when he thought I was at Media Law class and wouldn't be home until 3:10.
Dirty Stuff:
Well, I surfed the site, and I was a little disappointed. The pages were slow to load, and a lot of them made you pay, which is annoying, because I really don't want "Kandee's Hungry Mouth" or whatever to show up on my Visa statement next month. But of the free links, for women I'd highly recommend "Kate's Dicks" and "Sexratz for Women and Lovers", although the latter never really loaded and I am still wondering what "Sexratz" are. Guys, I find the "Hourly and Daily Quick Picks" to be a good find, since they are classified by category. Hey, different strokes for different folks, right? They're quick and easy and most guys I know are all about that. (Sorry, cheap shot, just kidding.) God, the puns are plentiful in this post.
Street Cred:
Well sadly, this site has none. This is the LeBron James of the porn world, long ago sold out to tasteful porn seekers and pay-for-porn business models. Better luck with the next review, I guess.
Mojo:
From a woman's perspective, I think it's tolerable. I like the little "Proof that Purrs, Claws, and Curiosity will get you anywhere" tagline. Clever marketing. It's like our own little Wild Animal Kingdom, but with people, not animals. I don't know how effective this site is in riling up the male mojo...there's a lot of pink and flowery stuff, which could just make you think of whiny, relationship-begging girls who want to cuddle and watch movies. And I am a girl, but I do know that when it comes down to business, you're not thinking about the former. You're thinking Jenna Jameson and condiments.
Overall Satisfaction:
Well, it ain't the creme de la creme, but it will get the job done. It's nicely organized, full of variety, and ribbed for her pleasure.
Grade: A-
posted by KA @ 8:50 PM
2 Comments:
I love how my name is associated with this. Karen, I have a career to think about. Kidding. I just hope my brief career in porn stays in Japan where it belongs. It was kind of like Bill Murray in Lost in Translation.
I think this is a very interesting topic that people would be more likely to discuss, but it is up to people like you and me to speak for them. Keep up the good work and even though people are not commenting you know they are reading. Your counter is proof.
Thank you for those kind words, Kyle. I'm going to keep doing reviews. You know why? I like them. Reason enough.
Yes, it's rather amazing the number of people who now hesitate before telling me a secret or who think twice before crossing me. Rightfully so, you never know where or when they'll show up on here. I'm sure you can relate to this, but to a larger magnitude, what with Chief Source being a top-tier publication and whatnot.
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