BBPC Affirmations
Before I go out tonight, I wanted to affirm a few things, and I figured that the best way to insure that I stick to these rules is to literally write them down.So before the Big Birthday Pub Crawl (BBPC), I am laying down some ground rules about my behavior. I am going to try to stick to these rules no matter how under the influence I am. Here we go:
1. I will act like a lady. I will not do any of the following tonight: stand in a position that will give someone a cheap shot up my skirt, throw my ass in someone's face while dancing, burp loudly in a group of people, or hook up on a dance floor. That is sick.
2. I will not accept a cheap plastic crown of any kind, and then proceed to put it on my head and walk around like I am royalty. I am aware of the fact that guys think that girls who wear them are dumb bitches (most girls think this too), and I agree with this sentiment.
3. I will not use the cheap excuse of my birthday to try and get anyone to buy me a shot, not even if he's really good looking and I think it's my only "in" on the conversation.
4. I will keep secrets. I will not tell one girlfriend that the other girlfriend said her ass was fat when we were out last Saturday, or any sort of secret that I am not supposed to tell.
5. I will keep my musical tastes to myself. I will not screech "I LOVE THIS SOOOOONG!!!" when, say, Ludacris' "Area Codes" comes on, and then proceed to say the same thing with every consequent song.
That just about covers it.
posted by KA @ 3:45 PM
4 Comments:
Area Codes is so 2001. You need to move on to the new song "Get Back" and prepare for Luda's new album Red Light District.
God, I love luda
Dear Karen,
This isn't Sex and the City, and you clearly aren't having any, so quit trying to fool us.
Yours Truly,
Michael Maney
John, thanks for the nice wish. It was a kick ass birthday. I will be posting more on this later, among other things. I will try my best not to let you or anyone else down.
Chuck, I agree. I really need to get my shit together and explore new Luda. I've been listening a lot to the "on"s (J-Kwon, Akon, etc.). I'm trying really hard...will let you know if I can move past 2001. BTW, good segue on Chief Source. You're doing a fine job.
To Anonymous (whoever you really are, Maney or not), I am not trying to be Sex and the City, and I never was. I am just me, and this is all in good fun. If you don't like it, I think you should piss off and stop reading. And I don't comment on my sex life out of respect for people involved, some of whom are friends who actually read this blog. I'm classier than feeling the need to formally announce it every time someone lays the pipe to me. Hope this addresses your concerns.
Yours,
Karen
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