Confessions of A Naughty Girl

Congratulations Hoes, We've Killed Chivalry

Okay, question: when did chivalry die?

I know a lot of guys would argue that chivalry died with the women's movement, but that's not true. It happened in a much longer time span than that. And some might argue that chivalry isn't dead, but then why don't I see more guys taking girls out and being nice to them instead of bitching that some slut won't (insert rejected request here).

I was reading people's instant messenger profiles from my buddy list today, and I came across a quote from a girl I used to have a class with in college who I still talk to occasionally. The quote:

"A good friend picks you up when you fall... a best friend laughs her ass off, trips you again, and calls you a slut"

Hmm, something is amiss. The fact that this girl is proud to have her friends call her a skank, and actually values their friendship...frankly, that's disturbing. And in my opinion, it's only contributing to this ever-growing evaporation of "true gentlemen" in our age bracket.

I have always been a big supporter of women's rights to choose whatever they want to do, and to be given opportunities to excel. And no, this doesn't make me a lesbian, and it doesn't even really make me a feminist (in fact, surprisingly, I am more old-fashioned at heart than you might think). It makes me a strong person. But - and here's where it gets tricky - I think that in spite of having the same opportunities and lifestyle choices that men have (which I believe we really do at this point, so mission accomplished) - that men should (gasp) still act like men, and women should still act like ladies. Since when has opportunity been directly correlated to chivalry?

Admittedly, acting "like a lady" is an uphill battle for me sometimes. I'm an ambitious person, I have a trucker's vocabulary, and I've been told that when it comes to certain things, I tend to "think more like a man" (whatever that means). But hey, at least I put asterisks in my more abrasive swear words. Like a f*cking hip lady would.

Guys, chivalry is not dead. I speak on behalf of many lady friends and acquaintances. Acting like a gentleman means that you should pursue girls. Call us, talk to us, take us out. Open the f*cking car doors. Stand on the outside of sidewalks so that should a car hit us, it hits you first. Pay for dinner, at least on occasion. Last time I checked, no girlfriend of mine has ever complained that she felt uncomfortable with a guy doing "guy stuff" - like making her feel safe, or getting a little (note: a little) protective when jealous about another guy. I speak on behalf of many of us when I say that we expect you to be this way. We like you this way.

For me, more masculine = better. I love a guy who watches sports (even if I don't), can chug a good beer, and throw a mean punch -- after he offers me his jacket when I'm cold.

Which brings me to the present - I just don't see/hear about this stuff happening anymore. And it's a sad snowball effect. I think men aren't making the effort because women don't expect them to. And the fewer gentlemen there are, the less women will expect of men. I'm not sure if it will ever turn around, and that's kind of scary.

posted by KA @ 10:32 PM